A long time ago, I broke a guy’s heart. This is part of that story.

Broken windmill

He came to life through bits and bytes
made the words sweet and light
he’d do anything for me
and he did every day until the day he broke my heart

An afternoon stroll through Maastricht
he held my hand as we walked through town
the sweet smell of freshly baked bread
made us smile, brought back memories of times past
then, she asked who I was

He said she was a family friend
nothing more, no need to worry
my friend walked by her side
as he and I held hands
I thought of the freshly baked bread
as we walked through the day

she was more than a family friendship
he said not to worry
she was a lover
he said not to worry
I was to be his wife
he’d take care of me

The train ride from Utrecht to Rotterdam was quiet
only the sound of the ataractic, rhythmic wheels rolling over joints
he wanted to hold my hand
I said no, I’m tired, I want to be alone
two hands upon my head
a cracked train window

Speeding down the highway
somewhere in Rotterdam
another fight broke out
fist fight in the front seat
about eighty miles per hour
we arrived safely, but everything was broken inside

A winter chill fell over the windmills
some say it makes Kinderdijk more romantic
we could see our breath
our words hung in the air
she’s always going to be a part of our lives

My nose grew cold, my ears red from the wind
couples strode pas us
holding hands in this idyllic place
I still love you
but I can’t

He begged me not to go
tears streamed down his face
I heard the words, “I love you”
my soul was broken, the words cut my heart
I turned and walked away

I flipped the collar up on my black and purple jacket
to cover my cold and reddened ears
the distance between us grew
his words ached and crackled

“But I still love you”
My pace stumbled
I closed my eyes to keep the tears from falling
I had to keep on walking

I left him cold and empty
next to the windmill
where lovers like to pose
as I kept walking away