Writings

Solace does not come in darkness

Harvey outside our place at 554 W. 42nd Street.

Solace does not come in darkness
It gives sway to an unspeakable circumstance
moving in the shadows of the night.

3 a.m., is dark and silent,
a sense of calm settles over the land,
seemingly for everyone but you.

You sit and listen to the labored breathing of your dying cat
as you watch the clock slowly tick time until the holidays are over
and your vet can perform a mercy.

Too weak to give you a kiss
he tilts his head for another kiss on the head
and purrs as he rests his frail body on the cool living room floor

There is no one to lend a shoulder to lean your head upon in these desolate hours
the cold windows, with edges touched by frost
provide no warmth, no comfort from the impending demise.

The sweet sound of silence you are accustomed to no longer soothes the soul
as the scythe of death slowly, silently sways in the distance,
awaiting its moment to snuff the remaining graceful embers of feline life.

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18 Comments

  1. Candice

    So that’s what was going on – Paul had posted something on Facebook, but I wasn’t sure what happened. Sorry to hear about your kitty – it’s so hard to lose a pet

    • Irene

      We’ve been keeping it quiet. The vet said a few weeks at best, but it’s been weighing on us quite a bit.

  2. Katie Bradshaw

    I’m so sorry, Irene. It’s such a hard time. We struggled with the timing with our beloved Weasel cat when she was in her last days. I feel for you. I’ve been up since 2am worrying about my own little worries, so I was out there with you in a way. We just didn’t know it.

    • Irene

      Thanks you. I would have texted you if I knew. And, yeah, we are the ones that will have to make the final decision and it’s been really hard.

  3. Jenny Harms

    I’m sorry that you and Paul are going through this, it’s hard to lose a member of the family. He’s leaving a lot of good memories behind to help comfort you. I’ll be thinking of you.

  4. Oh, it’s so hard to lose a kitty. My heart still aches when I think of my little black and white cat that I had to let go, and that was decades ago. They do ensnare our hearts, so very sorry for your pain. The poem was a beautiful expression of loss and grief.

    • Irene

      Thanks, Annie. We’re taking it moment by moment for now. He’s been with us for 13 years and we have many wonderful memories of him. They do become a part of a family you never want to let go.

  5. Bas

    So sorry to hear Irene. I know how heartbreaking it is to lose such an important family member. Wishing you some magical final moments together!

  6. AJ Legault

    Irene & Paul,
    Our pets are our kids, and it hurts so badly to coach them through such difficult situations.
    Jason and I are sorry to hear of this.

  7. Mindy

    Oh my goodness, I am so sorry! I know he is your baby! We are facing the same situation with our oldest girl. Time is near and its unbearable.
    Sending you our love!!!!

    • Irene

      Thank, Mindy. I hope you are doing okay with the situation as well. It’s really tough getting through it all.

  8. Dalene Louden

    Peace be with you Irene. Such sad news. Grief of our loved family members is so very hard. Thinking about you. He will be missed.

  9. Aunt Elaine

    Irene & Paul: So sorry to hear about your beloved cat. It’s hard to see them suffering and knowing there is nothing you can do. We went through the same thing with our dog, Bella, in September and had to make the heart wrenching decision for her. Our thoughts are with you; just know that you are ending the suffering, and that he had a good life and was well loved.

    • Irene

      Thanks, Aunt Elaine. I’m sorry to hear about Bella as well. It is a difficult decision to make, but, as always, we only want what’s best for them even if we’re not ready to let them go.

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